nothing new...

Just bored and feeling the need to ramble a bit. And not really about anything particular. Nothing is pissing me off so I have nothing to bitch about. I think sobriety agrees with me. It seems I accomplish so much more when I am not tired from drinking, etc. In addition I have gone BACK on my okinawan diet. I am sure that has tons to do with my energy levels being through the roof. Plus I have excercised everyday for the past 6 days. Things are moving along nicely. I like to be part of reality. Most the time anyway. Reality isn't as harsh when I am not constantly trying to escape it.

Mom...

So last weekend my Mom had her gallbladder removed. Of course the doctor said it should have come out MONTHS ago. That explains why she always felt so sick. Well OF COURSE our luck dictates that she has a complication. Apparently when they were doing the surgery a gallstone SOMEHOW got into one of her bile ducts and now she has to have an endoscopic retrograde cholangiopancreatography. If you don't know what that is look it up. Not pleasant. The most irriatating part of all was they sent her home last sunday after her surgery and at that point she couldn't even get out of bed. She was so sick all week; couldn't eat, couldn't sleep, couldn't go to the bathroom...it took the doctor almost a week to suggest she come back to the hospital. I suggested that the first day! Doctors...they piss me off.

Funnily enough...

Even though my mom just had surgery and I have spent time helping her out (which isn't bad, just grueling) I am still feeling fairly happy and content. I think I am becoming more comfortable in my own head. Anyway the thoughts aren't running as rampant as they once were. It's very calming.

eh...

I want to lead a better life. That's about all I have to say today.

Pooh of Walden Pond

A neat little essay. Check out Pooh of Walden Pond

I love this...

The following quote is very accurate:

When you look at the world and you talk to yourself about what's going on, you trust yourself. You just assume that you would tell yourself the truth. But, you need to stop and ask, are you giving yourself factual information or are you telling yourself what you want to hear?

The only way you will ever know is to start challenging what you're saying against some objective standard. Are the things you're saying, truly in your best interest? Are they based on fact? Do they protect and prolong your life? And do they truly get you what you really want? If you wake up one day and look back and realize, "I've spent most of my life working for what I don't want instead of what I do want," challenge your thinking. You won't lie, but you need to be sure and tell the truth.

Feeling Groovy...

I feel like a Simon and Garfunkel song today. I feel great! I got lots of good sleep with no chemicals in my body what so ever. I woke up, had a healthy breakfast and a brisk walk before leaving for work. It was nice and cold outside so the walk was invigorating to say the least. I have been completely clean of any chemicals since Friday night...including caffeine, processed foods, etc. It's amazing how much I have been accomplishing! And it is amazing how absolutely clear all my thoughts are. Ok enough of making you all read about my great feelings. I need to go play dress-up with Kathryn now.